Friday, 30 January 2015

2:34am

The last blog post was a joke. An actual, literal, haha-laugh-out-loud-funny fucking joke.

I started this blog thinking I’d travel the world, take so many drugs my hallucinations will be hallucinating and maybe actually not be so fucking socially inept all of the time. People would come here, read it and weep whilst being overcome in upmost envy because my life is amazing. But then it hit me, I’m boring as fuck, and poor as fuck. I’m too much of a good little girl to do anything worth writing about, and anything I have done I’m too much of a good girl to actually write about. Then, of course, the interesting things I could do without being a hoe are too costly for my -£1000 bank account. 

SOS 

I went to order pizza about an hour ago and just stared at my phone for 10 minutes.
“Ah but I’ll feel bad for eating shit tomorrow.” So I didn’t order the pizza.

I went to the pub after work, it was shut meaning everyone went back to someones house.
“Ah but if I leave now I’ll make my last tube.” So I got the last train. 

I’ve said no to all of the silly little things for too long now which consequently has made me a personality-less mother fucker. I feel like a 14 year old emo kid discovering Tumblr for the first time; reblog depressed quote; reblog Dr Who meme; reblog life! Reblog reblog reblog. 

SOS 

Who knew denying yourself a good ol’ pepperoni pizza could lead to such a ludicrous and irrational train of thought? Choo Choo.. next stop insanity! 

I do love my own company, but not when it’s my only company. 

SOS
Save our souls
Save my soul. 


Fancy a jog? Yeah let me just find my heels...


As January comes to an end, I wonder how many New Year’s resolutions ended before the first month of 2015 has. As my friend’s did (and failed) the 21 days vegan fad, I continued with my every day life of eating Tesco meal deals and cake. Whilst walking to catch the train one anything but monumental day, I trotted along in my little-higher-than-normal black ankle boots. Damn, I thought, like I'm sure many of you girls out there have before as well, I wonder if you burn more calories in heels, I’am b o i l i n g.

Bam. The maybe-isn’t-as-ridiculous-as-it-sounds ‘high heel’ work out. Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t tried it or even even lasted more than a few hours in a pair of heels at one time, but there’s some people out there that give the work out some validity and plenty of people that have tried it. Apparently, it was quite the hype in America last year as well as London having it’s very own high heel coach. 

Interested yet? I was. This question was the catalyst for some strange Google searches. The idea behind it is that the shoe pushes you foot into an abnormal position, thus used more muscles to walk than you usually would, and with heel being heightened you tone the muscle more. Therefore, burning more calories! 

However, the argument is that whatever shoes are worn shouldn’t make a real difference. You can do more in flats, and some fitness shoes are built to help tone your legs and butt more - so why would you go through the pain of wearing heels? Women for decades have been warned of the risk of wearing heels, never mind to work out! Back pain, foot/joint damage and even issues with balance, is the thought of burning a few more calories even worth the pain? 

Nikki Manashe (just google her/it!), a personal trainer in London has created a ‘stiletto work out’, which became very popular early last year. She has clients do sit ups, kicks and squats in their high heels, all after making them gear up some good old trainers for a little run. At least that’s sensible! But experts say working out this way could lead to serious health issues later on.

And then there’s Heel Hop, (http://heelhop.com), basically a fitness regime revolving around high heels. If anything this work out focus’ heavily on women being ‘sexy’, after all that is in their tag line. Typical. A woman can’t simply work out, but she needs to work out in heels otherwise she won’t be sexy - or even confident. That’s what they’re selling really - fake confidence, because if you can work out in heels you can do anything! It’s very housewife-esc. There’s a pro; with this one you get a ‘High Heel instruction manual’… um.

As if things like this actually exist? SoDo we burn more calories in heels? Next time you're walking along and something pops into your mind - find the answer, or find a gap in the market! ha.
meone else who may have worn a pair of a-little-too-high ankle boots started a business from that question,

So, from the insane insanity workout to the squat challenge to the stiletto work out, what crazy fad have you given up yet? If you haven’t; welcome to February, give up!

Wednesday, 14 January 2015

Florin Dobre's Fall/Winter '15 Collection

Florin Dobre – Jan 13th 2015
Fall/Winter 2015 Collection
London Men’s Week (Day 3)


It is evident I am not a fashion buff and have no ‘real’ knowledge of the fashion industry – if I like something, I like it. Simple. So upon invitation I was dubious whether to accept an offer to go ‘behind the scenes’ of Florin Dobre’s fall/winter 2015 men’s collection.

The collection is based around William Shakespeare’s timeless novel, Romeo and Juliet, with the invitation following a recent trip to Stratford-Upon-Avon, Shakespeare’s home, this sparked my interest. Dobre is a Romanian designer who intended on taking the tragic tale and moving towards a more dramatic story, similar to Romanian tales that are heavily dramatized but remain optimistic. Keen to see how Florin Dobre will execute his visions, the invitation was accepted.

Upon arrival at the Romanian Cultural Institute, 2 hours before the show was due to start, event preparation was in full swing, despite the relaxed atmosphere. The venue was beautiful, extravagant mirrors with gold, vintage borders hung on the wall that complimented the oversized chandeliers and made everyone there feel grand. Florin Dobre personally handed out cans of Carling to his team and the models whilst encouraging a positive atmosphere and succeeding in doing so. From the start was obvious from the start that Florin was a genuine person and not simply a character created by his PR team, the designers personality was reflected in the models and staff who he had chosen to work with, a model - suited and made up, actually offered to get me a glass of water. After praising the teams working with Florin, I then learnt they were all in fact volunteers apart from a handful of people there that travelled with the designer from Romania.

Models paced between make up and wardrobe in their Tim Burton influenced make up, which undeniably struck me as strange considering the Romeo and Juliet theme.  With heavy wrinkles and dark circles around their eyes, models were aged at least 30 years by the great skill of the makeup team. However on arrival of Florin, make up were told that some models were meant to look happy, despite being previously instructed otherwise, although this was a small error in communication it didn’t create an issue and Florin remained relaxed and positive. At face value, the theme seemed very contradictory as if the designer hadn’t done his background research, or was he trying to be extravagant as most designers do, and trying to make a statement? If so, it didn’t seem to do anything but make people question his sanity.

Due to previous research, I was able to understand the aging faces of the models. In Romanian stories, there are typically grandparents of some sort within the tale who represent timelessness and hope, as well as a happy ending which contradicts the tragic ending for Romeo and Juliet who were unable to grow old together. Florin Dobre wanted to portray the optimism of his own life and Romanian culture in his work, however this wasn’t effective as it’s heavily reliant on the audience reading up before the show. Despite this, I feel a Romanian crowd would have understood his attempt so his attempts may be successful in his home. As well as this, the faces were made up very heavily, like proper theatrical make up which reflects the novel, dramatic theme the collection was inspired by. I greatly enjoyed the effort he put into spreading optimism in London and felt it was a very original, creative idea.

As the models got dressed and prepared for the performance, I soon started to get nervous for the designer although his spirits remained high. Dobre had not fitted the clothes to the boys; he had not even matched up their shoe size. It was an hour until the show was due to start. The designed was almost too laid back; he took an approach where ‘if the shoe doesn’t fit, you don’t wear it’. Props to him of course, it was risky since there was so little time before the grand finale but he pulled it off, all the models had an outfit to prance about in, (I’m not being rude- it’s basically what they did).

Once everyone was in their clothes, they stood in line waiting instruction. Instruction never came. Dobre handed them another can of Carling. There was no dress rehearsal.

The show was due to start at 7pm, although on arrival guests were not allowed in the main room until half past 7. They were ushered into a small room on the ground floor of the venue, filled with cheap white wine that tasted like a half drank bottle of Lambrini, left out in the sun for a week and then mixed with apple juice – which was actually placed in giant glass jugs on the table. Classy. Next to this sat a table of salami which I would assume was donated by their meat sponsor. Jägermeister also sponsored the events, where were the shots!?

Finally the guests piled into the room and to my surprised there were not enough seats. It was packed. It was hard to estimate the number of attendees as the last show Florin Dobre presented in London took place on a double decker bus and toured the capital for the day, thus there was no real way to tell who were there to actually see his collection. Despite the under preparation, the designer seemed to have a substantial following which led me to believe his collection would be impressive, and to readjust my opinion as I had in fact only saw 2 hours of what would have been months of work.

At 10 to 8, the show had still not started. Issues with the sound system they said, bullshit I thought. That playlist had been on repeat all day apparently, and certainly for the few hours I was there. One member of the audience turned to me and the makeup team to suggest starting a choir as we have learnt the playlist from listening all day. Other guests looked bored and impatient whilst most just chatted among themselves. When the show finally got started, there was so much going on as it Florin’s attempt to make it a theatrical performance as well as his collection debut didn’t work as well as intended. The infamous Romeo and Juliet prologue was read out by some prat with a book (when I say read, I mean he flipped pages back and forth, moved his mouth up and down without attempt to mimic words or even learn ANYTHING, even lyrics of songs which I knew from being there two hours). This ‘narrator’ was present throughout the show and took all attention away from the clothes and what was happening behind him (which was also bad – but slightly better- acting on behalf of the models).  

Each of the models walked the runway in a difference way, different pace and difference style. Was that intended? I don’t think so. Since they were all unpaid volunteers I can assume they are relatively new at modelling and 5 minutes with one of Florin Dobre’s team for a master class on how to walk, couldn’t have gone a miss. Although moral was high, the whole thing was so badly executed which I hate having to say as much as I hated watching it. The designer had such great ideas and potential but no one quite got in right, or so it seemed. Due to that idiot jumping about with a book, pretend fighting in the background and a random mash up of music, the real point of the event was lost and the collection was not presented well or even paid attention to. The outfits themselves were actually put together nicely and suited the boys that wore them – but that was pure luck. Florin was big on the big blazers and socks, and to my surprise I actually had a favourite piece; an oversized white blazer, white shoes paired with light grey shin length socks and a pink shirt. The collection was definitely unique as one model sported a flowery number, another in a peach suit made of that tooth pattern, you know, the one on all of the scarves (fashion genius over here). There was one of course, that looked like a giant poo – a gangster poo. Then out came Romeo and Juliet.

Florin Dobre is typically a male designer; he hasn’t done much, if anything, for women. This was evident in Juliet’s dress, looking like a long white night gown with fake flowers attached by a staple gun, and a black belt from Primark. Romeo’s outfit however was impressive, the design and stitching looked amazing and his shoes had a flowery pattern embroidered which matched Juliet’s dress and his shirt. This was their wedding outfits, because in Florin’s version of the novel, they got married and lived happily ever after, which is what was said after they walked the catwalk together. The end.

What a bunch of shit. And a shame too. Nah, it was alright really. The ideas were great, some of the collection was really strong but others let it down. Florin Dobre is a wonderful guy but ‘too’ laid back. The whole thing was under prepared and under rehearsed which is what really ruined it. It was a great experience, however if I didn’t go backstage, I would have an entirely different opinion of it as the show itself was a serious anti-climax. Of course I stood and cheered like a fool at the end, whilst Florin lead his models back down the run way to do his tradmark (very similar to the well known high school musical jump) jump.


Florin Dobre's officaily website: http://florindobre.ro/


Romeo and Juliet - Florin Dobre's Fall/Winter '15 Collection